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There are many things that changes in a woman when she hits menopause. During this phase of her life not only does the body undergo biological changes but also she deals with a lot of mood fluctuations and psychological changes as well. As a husband, if your partner has hit menopause, it doesn’t mean that you can’t continue to have great sex with her. But, for Having Great Sex After Menopause, you need to work with her to keep it awesome. Here is Husband’s Guide To Having Great Sex After Menopause on how you can do it and enjoy great sex after 50.
Staying healthy is important to keep the sex good. If she feels tired and exhausted she would not want to indulge in it. As her partner, encourage her to eat healthy and get adequate physical exercise. There is no need to over do things, but a balanced approach will definitely make her feel better. As her partner, set an example by doing the same yourself. When she finds you eating better and going out for those morning jogs at the park she will follow you as well. Maybe you can even cook healthy meals together – not only it will be a fun bonding time but also she will be eating healthy.
While it is alright to enjoy a glass of wine occasionally, you need to keep her away from alcohol and cigarettes if she is addicted to it. The same goes for excessive consumption of caffeine and also junk food. All these do more harm to the body and more so a menopausal one.
A menopausal body needs rest so that it can have the energy to perform the tasks when the time for it comes. If you find that your wife is overworking then ask her to relax. Help her with the house chores so that she is not burdened with all of it. You can even relax her with a massage, a shared hot shower, or even send her off for a day to get pampered at the salon. When she feels rested and rejuvenated, of course she will have sex with you.
Start reading up about menopause and the various ways a woman can feel better when she reached this phase. If you know about it, you can egg on your partner to get such therapies done so that she feels better and more energetic. For example, a hormone replacement therapy can help reduce her hot flushes and hence she will be able to sleep better.
She might be an independent woman but she will definitely feel a lot more confident if you are around when she goes to the doctor. While the doctor will do his best in advising her of the various treatments to relieve her of the uncomfortable symptoms, your presence would make her know that you are there for her even during this phase of her life when she doesn’t feel on top of the world. The affection that you will show by your presence will make her want to get and stay close to you. Also when both of you discuss, together, how menopause is affecting your sex life and the advice that doctor gives you will help both of you more than if she were to go for these visits alone.
A menopausal woman might be shying away from sex because it is painful for her. This happens due to vaginal dryness. As her partner, if you are spending a good amount of time with her, you will know that she is not rejecting your advances but she is scared to have sex because it makes her feel physically uncomfortable. So, this is the time when you coax her into it by showing her that there are ways that it can be easier for her.
She is not getting into her menopausal stage on purpose just to shun you. Know that this is a phase that happens to every woman and when it does they do have mood swings and tempers. So, both of you feeling angry at the same time will not do you any good. Start not by blaming her, instead be gentle and let there be no sex for few nights. Instead cuddle and kiss her and make her feel loved. Face this as a couple because if the connection stays, the rest will fall into place.
It is not easy for the woman to deal with the changes that her body is going through. It might be that she shuts herself up and goes silent. Show care and keep encouraging her to speak to you about what she feels. The more she opens up the better she feel. This, in turn, will do well for her libido that has been falling at this age. Sometimes you might find that she is talking to her friends more about this than she does with you. Don’t get offended by this. At the end of the day, she needs to keep the communication channels open – that is most important.
Don’t make this a taboo topic but rather talk about it. Don’t try to read her mind. With age likes change and talking about it is the best remedy. This could be about:
As she goes through menopause and takes up the challenges that it throws up, you should become her support system. Be around to help her cope through her mental and biological changes. Maybe the emotional upheaval within her is affecting her Relationships with others like her kids, friends, or even those at work. If she keeps it all bottled inside she will be too stressed to have a good time with you in bed. Instead, if she had you to be with and open to without being judged it would help her calm down a lot.
A woman who doesn’t like her body can rarely have a good time in bed. A menopausal woman is likely be low on confidence because she doesn’t like how she looks and feels anymore – especially with all the sagging skin and wrinkles. Maybe she has started to think that you will not value her as much because she has lost her youthfulness. This is where you have to reassure her that you are there for her.
Your partner is going through a bodily change. This is a slow process and she won’t be able to come to terms with it suddenly. So, instead of cribbing or even looking elsewhere to satisfy your sexual needs, talk to your partner and together set realistic goals. Strategize by finding ways that will make the sex more comfortable for her and then aim to have the physical union once a week. Choose a time when the both of you feel fresh and are in the best of moods. It was only with time that the both of you will again manage to get into a routine that the both of you will enjoy.
Even if it is not as often as it used to be, don’t stop it completely. Tell your wife that if she continues to have sex then the sexual stimulation will promote vaginal elasticity that will alleviate the pain that she feels during intercourse. If she doesn’t want to do it on some days then indulge in cuddles and then mutual masturbation. The important thing is to share a physical connect.
Your partner is edging towards menopause but still hasn’t. This means that her menstrual cycle is irregular but not over. Hence, so as to avoid any pregnancy at this age you should always use contraception. Pregnancy at this stage can not only be threatening to your partner’s life but the child, so born has high chances of birth defects. Contraception is also good because during this time the vaginal line has thinned and so is more susceptible to sexually transmitted diseases. Hence it is better to use protection.
Menopause is not an illness – it is a part of every woman’s life. If she has a partner like you who is concerned and caring, she will not only be able to deal with it more positively but will also continue to enjoy sex with you.