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Post Divorce: Give A Chance To Second Love
December 17, 2019 | Life | By Jason Reid
The fact that your marriage didn’t work doesn’t mean love isn’t real or disqualifies you from finding love again. Apprehensions or self-doubt could set in, flashbacks may become a norm and overall it may be a stressful period. Worries are usually short-lived as just like the period leading up to divorce this too shall pass and the onus of starting over lies on you. Seniors facing bouts of loneliness and stress can find hope in their second love. With experience of dealing with the first you are bound to not repeat mistakes. We never plan for love to fail and consistently hope for a miracle but if it does fail, second love could easily fill in.
The reason couples in their second marriages seem to be happier isn’t rocket science or just luck. Love for your own self ensures careful evaluation and time investment to not repeat mistakes a second time. Individuals in second relationships could easily identify aspects that worked a second time, off the many points, here’s what we believe could be a good love list to follow post-divorce.
1. Learn From The Past And Move Ahead
Remember The Happy Moments
Happiness can be created by both partners alike and it’s time to think about them and look forward to a fresh innings.
Learn From Past Mistakes
We always have aspects that we regret or feel could be avoided. You know them and would also know those are best avoided for a stable future.
Be Positive
Though this time could be taxing, it’s your positivity which will get you going again. So stay on the positive side, inside out.
Leave The Baggage Behind
Pondering too much on the past isn’t going to get us too far. It’s best to let the past fade away and focus on a glorious new start. Find someone who wouldn’t take advantage of your insecurities and helps you become a better person, liberating you from whatever is holding you down.
2. Getting Ready For A Second Inning Of Love
Rewrite Your Own Rules
Giving chance to second love gives you an opportunity for a fresh new beginning and a clean slate. You can make new rules and create new dimensions for yourself.
Set Your Priorities
You can start all over again and set the foundation straight with a totally new approach. You are now free to define your goals and priorities while hunting for love and after finding love.
Liberate Yourself
Your new found freedom is one to be cherished and enjoyed. Consider yourself liberated from shackles that masked your past decisions. You get the chance to be loved in a whole new way and experience life from a totally different perspective.
3. How To Prepare Yourself And The Mind
Reinvent Yourself
Yes it’s easier said than done you may say, but give it a shot while you have a chance. You are a new person looking at a new relationship and one that doesn’t need to be based on a past self-portrayal. Find your negatives and work on new positives.
Open Your Heart
Hurt are we! Love isn’t going to walk into our lives, we will need to step out of our shell and open up to find the perfect one.
Physical Rejig
While we all know the benefits of keeping good health, some of us rarely focus on it. This is the time for you to push yourself to get in shape and believe it can be done.
4. Transform
Happiness Indulgence: Reconnecting with self, finding a new passion, travel, finding lost friends, family or club participation, independent financial planning, wellness and massage whatever makes you groove is what you do. This is your time and you can choose to indulge.
Explore Your Wild Side
Are there things you could never do in a marriage and always fantasized. You got your opportunity now! Be it traveling alone to jumping off a plane, you have it all available at a snap.
Be Sexy and Sensual
Now that you’ve made the decision to give a second chance to love, make sure to look the part too. Love comes more naturally when you look and feel approachable. So get your look in place and don’t forget to smile.
Love Yourself
Though we mentioned indulgence, this is more to do with your feelings for self. You love yourself, feel good and it shows.
5. Choosing Your Date
Avoid Toxic Personalities
There’s a chance you may not notice this on the very first date, but if you find out with time still on hand, get out. It’s always better than being stuck another time. If you do get stuck again, set record straight while the relationship is still new.
Happiness Is Supreme
You don’t feel happy, it isn’t worth the trouble. Better to pass and save the arss.
Mutual Respect
Relationships core is always the respect you have for one another. If you give respect, you get it back too so make sure to take the first steps to establish respect and trust will follow.
Remain Passionate About Each Other
Is your partner someone you are excited about. Are there clear signs of passion in the relationship and do you look forward to the time together? These are your signs to tell that its working.
Sexual And Sensual Compatibility
It may not be seen as the most important of them all, but believe us at all ages sexual compatibility is huge. Matching each other’s drive is so important that it could be the single biggest building block or disappointment in a relationship. So indulge while also talking and discussing likes and fantasies.
When the time comes to actually having a fresh start, you owe it to yourself. You are no longer the young and restless and chances are you know a lot more about life and life partners than in the past. It will take effort, give it time, deploy learnings and look at an overhaul that gets you ready again. While you got the chance, enjoy life going easy or the fast lane and make certain you get your groove again.
Life’s book has many chapters and as you flip the pages experiences grow. Divorce is done and it’s time to get going so you can find that perfect partner you missed the first time.
